


"It's Prom Night, Dopinder."

by Movie_Riggs



Category: Deadpool (2016), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Crossover, Dopinder is a full-time superhero uber, F/M, Or he might as well be, Prom, Scorpion attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-18
Updated: 2018-04-18
Packaged: 2019-04-24 18:24:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,784
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14361075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Movie_Riggs/pseuds/Movie_Riggs
Summary: Dopinder is no stranger to driving superheroes around New York, but that doesn't mean it never gives him a headache. Thus, he's quite pleased when his latest customer is just a high school teenager on his way to prom. Not a superhero.Right?





	"It's Prom Night, Dopinder."

**Author's Note:**

> I cooked this idea up today in class and couldn't resist.
> 
> Also, after writing my other Peter/Michelle fic, I kind of depressed myself and needed to write something more uplifting with these two.

_"...prison break earlier this afternoon. Several dangerous criminals were confirmed to have escaped, including the infamous Mac Gargan, who..."_

Dopinder changed the radio station to something a bit more cheery (like actual music, and not the droning voice of the reporter). It was Saturday night, after all, and if he was going to be stuck in an evening shift, he might as well have a little fun. A prison break was no big deal, anyway. Not in today's world. Any number of New York's superheroes were likely already making sure the situation was under control. 

Oh yes, Dopinder was no stranger to superheroes. In fact, he was on a first-name basis with a particularly foul-mouthed, gun-toting character who, as it turned out, gave very questionable advice on Dopinder's romantic life. Even though transporting the guy to all of his action scenes was something of a chore that usually ended in Dopinder getting a headache (and possibly being shot at himself), he always liked superheroes and thought they had helped make the world a much better place in the last decade or two.

That being said, some days Dopinder just needed to deal with regular customers. It kept him sane, and paid the bills (superheroes tended not to have any money on their person to pay him with). Thus, he was quite relieved when he was flagged down by a very ordinary-looking young man in a dark gray suit.

"Hello, sir!" Dopinder greeted as his customer climbed into the backseat. "Where to?"

The boy, who was no older than seventeen, took a break from combing his hands through his unkempt hair to gesture forward. "Just down the block, actually. We're picking somebody else up."

"Very good," Dopinder nodded, pulling out from the curb.

"Dopinder," he introduced himself.

The boy offered him a friendly smile as he desperately tugged at the tie that was virtually choking him to death. "I'm Peter. Parker."

"Why the fancy dark suit, Mr. Parker?"

Peter's grin was equal parts nervous and delighted. "Oh, that's because it's prom night, Dopinder. I'm going to pick up my date now. I've been waiting one year, three months, and seven days...almost to the second, actually...for this night."

"Ah, yes," Dopinder nodded fondly. "Prom. A very exciting American tradition. I remember my prom night. I had the most beautiful date...her name was Gita."

"Gita, huh?" Peter repeated back, trying to discreetly tuck his webshooters further down his sleeves. He had no intention of running off from the dance (not this time), but ever since Midtown High Homecoming 2017, he had learned that it was better to be prepared for the worst. Like when your date's dad turned out to be a weapons dealer dressed like the buzzard from _Rudolph's Shiny New Year_. Thankfully, there was a 100% chance that his date's dad was not a supervillain this time around. Speaking of dates, Dopinder was still idly chitchatting about his.

"...and so I was forced to watch Gita dance with my romantic rival Bandhu all night long. I really hate prom."

Peter winced. "Geez, I'm, uh...sorry about that, Dope..." He suddenly realized they were right where they needed to be. "Right here!"

Dopinder brought the taxi to a stop. 

"Be right back!" Peter said, jumping out of the backseat at lightning speed. 

Dopinder started flipping through the radio channels once more, whistling to himself. Peter returned almost as quickly as he had left, only this time he had a strikingly beautiful girl on his arm. Dopinder observed the couple with a knowing smile as they entered the backseat. The girl was almost an inch taller than Peter (and she wasn't even wearing heels). She was dressed in a warm orange gown which did wonders to accentuate the chocolate of her eyes. She looked a little uncomfortable in the fancy getup to say the least, but in the long run it didn't seem to matter. Peter's eyes were alight and all he could do was stare at her. In turn, his date would smile bashfully and call him a loser for not being able to look away long enough to put his own seat belt on correctly.

Dopinder greeted the girl with a nod, but neglected to talk much further to the two. He was content to listen to their rather entertaining banter on the drive.

Peter (and his date, who he called "MJ") were attending quite a fancy venue for their senior prom that evening. As he pulled the taxi to a stop, Dopinder looked out at the building, which was already being flocked by other teenagers, and wondered how a simple high school had managed to afford such a place. Peter and MJ, of course, knew it was because Peter had rather close ties with a certain billionaire.

"Thanks a lot, Dopinder," Peter said, presenting the driver with the cash he was owed. 

"Oh, you're quite welcome, Mr. Parker. Have a lovely night."

Peter couldn't resist glancing at MJ yet again. "Oh, we will."

The couple exited the taxi, Peter holding the door open for MJ (she thanked him by making an offhand, only half-serious remark about how sexist it was). Just before closing the door, Peter leaned back into the taxi. 

"Hey Dope, you think you could stop by here again around 11?"

Dopinder checked his wrist, which had no watch strapped to it. "Barring any unforeseen circumstances, I would love to. See you then, Mr. Parker."

 

* * *

 

 

Dopinder returned just before 11 o'clock to find the once-breathtaking venue an absolute mess. Every window the building had was shattered, and telltale flames still licked the corner of one of the walls--the result of an electrical explosion of some kind.

Police cars were everywhere, accompanied by a S.W.A.T. truck and a Damage Control van. The van was being loaded with a large machine that had once been colored dark green but was now mostly blackened. Dopinder scanned the machine curiously. It looked as though it might have been capable of housing a pilot at some point; perhaps it was a suit. But the most notable feature was the long, tail-like mechanism which extended from the machine's backside. 

Dopinder was just starting to consider leaving his taxi momentarily in order to investigate further when the back door was jerked open. In spite of himself, Dopinder jumped and let out an unmanly squeak. Thankfully, the three young people hurriedly entering his taxi took no notice. Dopinder was just about to tell them that the taxi was being reserved for someone when he realized that two of the three teens were Peter and MJ. 

Peter, whose lip was bruised and was now sporting a cut over his right eye. Breathing heavily, he managed to say, "Drive, Dope!"

Dopinder obliged, gunning the engine and peeling away from the chaos at the venue. 

He did his best to keep his eyes on the road while still looking back at his passengers through the rearview mirror every second he could spare. Peter was nearly lying down across the backseat, his head in MJ's lap while she told him to "just breathe." The third passenger was a heavyset boy wearing an Indiana Jones fedora. This boy, though obviously concerned that his friend was hurt, simply could _not_ stop beaming and going on and on about, "...and then that scorpion guy's tail-thingy started shooting _knives_ , and then you were just like _thwip! thwip!_ and you blocked 'em all, and then Flash started screaming like a little girl, and then MJ _hit the scorpion guy with a chair_ \--that was awesome, by the way--and then I was like, 'You talkin' to me?' and you swung in and..."

"NED!" Peter and MJ chorused together in exasperation. Ned finally remembered that they were not the only ones in the taxi.

"Oh! Hi, sir!" he waved. 

Dopinder waved back. "Hello. Uh, Mr. Parker...may I ask what happened and should I be driving towards the nearest hospital right now?"

Peter sat up a bit, still leaning on MJ for support. "Hey, Dope. No, don't worry about the hospital. It's not as bad as it looks. But, uh, that back there? It was nothing, really. Just an attack."

"A _scorpion_ attack!" Ned cut in. "A giant metal scorpion attacked our prom! But Spider-Man came just in time and stopped him!"

"Ah, Spider-Man, huh?" Dopinder said in amazement. "Big fan of that guy. He never even has to use taxis. He just swings everywhere on those strands of wrist-rope."

"Webs," Peter corrected habitually. Suddenly, he looked up at MJ, who was staring at him while trying to disguise her concern. "I'm so sorry," Peter apologized. 

MJ shook her head. "It's not your fault."

"But I wanted to have a great prom night! And that guy was after Spider-Man. If I--I mean, if he--hadn't locked that guy up in the first place..."

"Then he might have hurt a lot more people than he did," MJ said. "What, you're mad our prom wasn't normal? Do you _expect_ things to be normal with...everything?"

Peter shook his head. "No, of course not. I mean, I don't need them to be normal. But you..."

MJ let out an unrestrained laugh. "Parker, c'mon! It's like you don't know me at all! Normal things suck! Normal people suck. Hence why I'm okay dating you."

"Thanks, MJ," Peter murmured, and Dopinder had to smile at the sweetness of it all.

"Wait," Peter said. "Did you just call me weird?"

 

* * *

 

 

After Ned was dropped off at his house, Dopinder next drove the taxi back to MJ's apartment building. 

"Be just a minute, Dope," Peter said, once again exiting the taxi and holding the door open for his girlfriend. 

Dopinder could not help but notice the cut above Peter's eye seemed to be healing uncharacteristically quickly. 

He waited with the car running, once again flipping through the radio stations (honestly, it was just habit at this point). After almost five minutes, he was beginning to wonder if Peter was coming back. Just then, the back door was jerked open and Peter stuck his head in. He was breathing rapidly again, though Dopinder had a feeling it was not for the same reason he had been doing so earlier.

"Hey, Dope," Peter said in between breaths. "Maybe you could...uh..." He glanced back at MJ, who was watching him slyly from the lobby door. "...maybe you could just drop us both here for the night, okay?"

Dopinder simply nodded. As Peter hurried back to MJ and they both entered her building, dropping kisses on one another as they went, Dopinder had to smile. Because who doesn't love a happy ending?

**Author's Note:**

> You were all waiting for Deadpool to make a cameo, weren't you? Well, we don't have that kind of money.
> 
> Anyway, what are you still doing here? The story's over. Leave a kudos and/or a comment, and go home. 
> 
> Go.
> 
> Chka-chka!


End file.
